


Dazed and Contused

by jessandl



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Brotp, Canon Compliant, F/F, Fight Club - Freeform, Gen, Oops, WynHaught - Freeform, everyone needs a hug in this one tbh, some wayhaught, to a degree, very little tho sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-23
Updated: 2019-06-23
Packaged: 2020-05-16 20:25:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19325473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessandl/pseuds/jessandl
Summary: There is no summary because the first rule of fight club is--you do not talk about fight club





	Dazed and Contused

**Author's Note:**

> TW: the tiniest mention of suicide--stay safe.
> 
> Here's some WynHaught for ya! This story would have taken place sometime in S3 after the gang buried Dolls--but before the curse was broken (and if we're honing in on little details...before Nicole became sheriff). Prepare for some senseless violence all in the name of avoiding emotions and dealing with your problems directly-yay!!
> 
> Shout out to my beta readers. Sam tried looking over this one as much as she could before giving up halfway through (I don't blame her). So strap in with some booze and drink with me every time you find a typo or an awkward sentence--hopefully I'll see you next time ( ; 
> 
> Jokes aside, thank you for reading. Comments and kudos are ALWAYS appreciated! Feel free to find me on Tumbr @hoe-plessgay or Twitter @Jessandl. Take care!

Wynonna was struggling to drag the redhead up the Homestead porch. She leaned Nicole against a support beam and swung the front door open. The redhead could only muster a grunt, fighting to stay conscious.

"Shit, hang in there--Haught," the Heir prayed, but it was barely a buzz to Nicole’s ears.

"Waverly! Get the kit!" Wynonna called as she tried to keep Nicole upright. The younger Earp sister descended the stairs in a hurry and rushed to Nicole's side--throwing one bloody and bruised arm over her shoulder. Working in tandem, the sisters placed the taller woman on the couch, Waverly jostled open the first aid kit and began patching up a deep cut above Nicole’s eye.

"What the hell happened? I thought you guys were just doing recon?" Concerned hazel eyes scanning over her contused-stricken girlfriend--her breathing inhibited by what one could only guess were freshly cracked ribs...a feeling she was becoming all too used to. The redhead’s jaw was clenched tight from the searing pain coursing through her body.

"We got spotted--I tried blasting the bastards away with Peacemaker but it crapped out on me. HaughtStuff here insisted on covering me while I tried to coax the damn gun into working again,” Wynonna muttered through tight lips, staring down at the barely conscious redhead--she did not dare to look at her sister, especially when she was lying through her teeth. 

She should have known better than to hide behind the same tell that she’s had since she was a kid. Waverly raised her eyebrow at her older sister, giving her a sidelong glance before returning her attention to Nicole’s wounds.

Wynonna and Nicole weren't fighting revenants--they were fighting regular people every weekend in an underground fight club--the only demons they have been clashing with were their own.

Typically, Nicole secured a win within the first round thanks to her skill and wingspan, but this time around, she struggled as she faced off against a six-foot woman who was built entirely out of muscle. Polished combat techniques paired with quick thinking helped the redhead emerge victorious--not without cost, she collapsed outside of the fight club as they were trudging back to Wynonna's truck. 

Wynonna was helpless in the situation, she was the corner-man that night. All she could do was yell at Nicole to fight harder, smarter, and stay alert. Wynonna gritted her teeth as she watched heavy fists and elbows rain down on Nicole's head, her opponent straddling her until she was bucked off so hard the crowd could hear the sound of a skull bouncing off the concrete. The spectators roared in delight at the merciless brawl before them. Most of the crowd was comprised of women representing different parts all over the region. Attendees were practically foaming at the mouth for a chance to either throw their hat in the ring--or profit off of the poor souls that do.

Nicole was doing everything she could to make it look like she was unmarred, hiding her exhaustion from her face while her muscles ached and burned. She seized the downed opponent with a ground and pound. Seeing a red the shade of her own spilled blood, Nicole hammered out a steady rhythm with her uninhibited fists. The fight was over and Nicole had won, but she kept going--her teeth bared, snarling as she continued to slug the flattened opponent. Sweat burned the redhead’s eyes as she let herself become consumed by profound fury. Wynonna was yelling but it was only a faint hum to Nicole's ears. She got shoved, hard--Wynonna caught hold of the taller woman and with all her might dragged her outside of the fight circle, collecting that night's winnings on the way out.

Cash was nice, but it was about the rush.

Since Dolls' death--Nicole and Wynonna were struggling to cope. Too many emotions with no outlet, gradually became numbness. Over a bottle of whiskey, Wynonna broke first. The redhead had stopped by the Purgatory Police Station to collect some work to bring home one night. She found Wynonna weeping into a bottle of whiskey in the BBD headquarters. Nicole dropped down next to Wynonna and before she knew it they were both sobbing together. Wynonna managed to compose herself enough to confess how numbness and apathy were gnawing at her being--Nicole admitted she felt the same. Wynonna howled inside the dark office, asking for strength to carry on--or at least a swift end to her pain. Nicole held the Heir tight and reminded her of everything that she had accomplished up to this point--reassuring her that no matter what happened next, that she was going to have support every step of the way--that someday soon, she would finally feel again.

Waverly was trying to be the strong one, for her sister and for Nicole. She was waiting in the living room when Nicole carried her older sister through the front door. Her first instinct was to help--but she had to fight to keep quiet when Nicole gave her a look that said _please, not now._

All three women were huddled together, staying like that until Wynonna finally fell asleep. Nicole carried her once more up to her bed and sat in a chair across the room. She didn't leave Wynonna's side for a second, despite Waverly urging Nicole to get some rest. She wasn't going to leave Wynonna alone, ever.

It should have been her.

It should have been Nicole that died. Waverly would have forgiven Wynonna eventually, more importantly, Dolls would still be alive. He built this team from the ground up, and contrary to his stoic exterior--he was also the rock everyone leaned on. Nicole remembered when he first told her about what really happened with the Cult of Bulshar. His eyes were soft and his voice barely a murmur, he held Nicole until her tears had subsided. Dolls wanted to help Nicole, but she couldn't help him. Not when he needed it the most. This was all her fault, now she owes Wynonna her life.

Which is why when Wynonna had asked her to come to a fight club in the big city some weeks ago, she said yes in a heartbeat.

They both fought that night, and they both won. Wynonna felt a rush like no other. She was a natural, bobbing and weaving through her opponent’s fists until she found an opening to deliver a devastating blow to the jaw. Something clicked for the Heir in that moment, this wasn’t just a chance to win the fight, it was a chance to let out everything she had been repressing since Dolls’ funeral. Wynonna’s eyes clouded with wrath as she trucked jab, after cross, after hooks to about every inch of her opponent’s body. She imagined herself on the receiving end of her fists and kicks, beating down her old self and feeble emotions as far into the ground as she could. This was her purpose now, her only avenue of maintaining some control of her life.

Nicole was more reluctant to participate, though she wasn’t about to back out last minute and let Wynonna down. She tried treating the fight as a run-of-the-mill training session at BBD headquarters. After receiving a hard crack to her cheekbone, she couldn’t hold back anymore.Growling, Nicole shook her fists to loosen up and swung into the side of the other fighter. It was a shock to her system, her adversary quickly swept her legs, effectively throwing the officer on her back. Nicole was too overwhelmed by the adrenaline coursing through her veins to feel any of the punches colliding with her body. She used her newfound strength to heave the woman off of her, striking the fighter with frenzied fists and a primal look in her eye until her arm was raised in triumph shortly after.

Fighting had become the women’s only way to release their pain--weakness wasn’t an option and emotions were out of the question...just the way they wanted it.

Going back to their normal, non-violent lives during the week was bordering on torture for the two. Wynonna was usually tense most days, aching to hit something or put a bullet into an unsuspecting revenant’s body. Nicole found solace in Waverly, (much to no one’s surprise) her girlfriend could tell that something was amiss--but she never asked, knowing that Nicole would tell her when she was ready. The youngest Earp tried to keep their days structured with planned family meals and outings. It was enough to keep everyone distracted long enough to fool themselves into thinking that everything was going to be okay. Nights were always the hardest on the trio. Waverly was usually woken up by either Nicole screaming because of her night terrors or Wynonna yowling in her sleep for Dolls. She noticed that both women tended to sleep rather peacefully on the weekends (after a fight, they managed to drain themselves to the point where they didn’t even dream for a few nights).

\--------

Nicole woke up with a throbbing headache, she groaned as she tried to sit up and felt a sharp pain in her side.

"Stay still, baby," Waverly soothed the redhead as she relaxed under the brunette's touch. Nicole hissed at the pain for a second before kissing Waverly's palm that cradled her cheek. Sunlight was trickling through the shades, Nicole didn't remember much about last night after the fight. She could only assume it was Wynonna who brought her home and--

Wynonna.

Nicole had turned her head until her eyes landed on the older Earp sleeping in a chair.

"She was there all night, sounds like you two were lucky to make it out alive yesterday," the smaller woman tried to hide the trembling in her voice.

"You know we're both too stubborn to die," Waverly’s lips curled into a grin as Nicole struggled to lean up and kiss her.

"I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"We-we should be taking it easy--trying not to die and all...especially after--" Nicole couldn’t bring herself to utter the words. She couldn’t talk about Dolls’ death without her self-loathing and guilt resurfacing like the dead in some b-grade zombie movie. A distant look plastered itself on the officer’s face, she went somewhere else--anywhere else to escape this conversation and bury the emotions creeping up from the pit of her soul with a rusty shovel and cinder blocks for assurance.

"Hey," Waverly traced one hand up the taller woman’s chest while the other reached under Nicole’s chin and turned her head so their eyes could meet.

"Wynonna has never taken it easy and she sure as hell isn't gonna start now. You know that, I know that, and Dolls knew that. You're being a good friend, Nicole--sure, I wish I could be there for the both of you even though my sister has me cooped up in here like Rapunzel--but I'm glad you're able to be there for her."

Nicole was hanging off of every word that Waverly spoke. They hadn't really sat down and talked through what was happening with her and Wynonna. Waverly would always give them both the space that they needed--maybe that was the last thing she should have been doing.

"Stay here, I'll make you both some breakfast," Waverly pressed a tender kiss to the one unscathed part of Nicole’s face she could see and left the room. Slowly, the redhead lifted herself out of the bed and limped over to Wynonna.

"Wynonna," Nicole whispered as she gently shook the Heir. Wynonna jerked awake and flailed in the chair for a few seconds before finally registering where she was.

"Christ, Haught I liked you better when you were unconscious," Wynonna winced as she sat up in her chair.

"You didn't tell Waverly, did you?"

"Tell her what?"

"The truth?"

"Oh you mean the fact that neither of us knows how to handle grief like a normal person so we did the only thing that seemed to make sense which was joining a fucking fight club? No, Nicole I didn't mention that to Waverly because I'm not gonna."

"Wy, I don't know how long I can keep this up,"

"Look, you can be the corner-man for a few fights if you want. I just--," Wynonna let out a heavy sigh, "I just need this--it's the only thing that is making me feel good, let alone feel anything at all. I need you in my corner Haught, please."

"I meant I don't know how long I can keep lying to your sister; you know the effect she has on me,” Nicole whispered urgently.

“Which is why you’re not the one lying, I am. You just keep your mouth shut and avoid letting those pouty lips tell Waverly about the fact that the two most important people in her life are in a fight club.”

Nicole scoffed at Wynonna’s remark, subconsciously touching her lips as she shot her a scowl. She didn't want to keep secrets from her girlfriend anymore, especially after the huge falling out they had with the DNA test--but she knew she didn’t have much of a choice. It was the least she could do, the guilt of being saved by Wynonna, being the one to live instead of Dolls was enough to drive Nicole to do whatever Wynonna needed, be whatever she needed, whenever she needed it. The officer wasn’t going to give the older Earp the chance to regret her decision.

“I'm always gonna be in your corner Earp, I'm not going anywhere,” Nicole placed a hand on her shoulder. Slate blue eyes searched into mahogany brown ones, finding comfort under her friend’s palm and fingertips. Wynonna trusted Nicole with her secrets, her family, her life. 

"So, how are you feeling?"

"Like I got run over by a parade of Mini Coopers," Nicole groaned, rubbing the back of her neck with her free hand.

"That's oddly specific but okay," they both shared a moment of deep silence. The taller woman could see that something was on Wynonna's mind--and the Heir opened her mouth as if she was going to say something but had thought twice about it. She finally looked up at Nicole with a sly smile and smacked the redhead's arm on her shoulder.

"Ow! What the Hell, Earp?"

"That's for not going for the knees last night, Haught. Gigantor back there would have crumpled in one foul swoop if you used your head."

"Going for her knees would have still been a long way down for me, Wynonna."

“Honestly Red, I thought I was going to have to drag your limp body from the ring last night…how did you manage to go from semi-conscious to She-Hulk?”

“I have--I have no idea,” Nicole stammered, “I don’t remember much after throwing her off of me, I just…blacked out after that.”

“Okay, do you want to talk about it?”

“Not one bit,” Nicole instinctively crossed her arms. Both Nicole and Wynonna had mastered the art of bottling up their emotions since Dolls’ death. Neither expressed feelings in any other form outside of fighting. It was the only way they felt heard, felt seen, and felt alive.

“Nicole Haught, do you not know what ‘get some rest’ means?” Waverly was in the doorway with two plates of food in hand. Nicole gave a tired smile as she made her way back to the bed.

“You didn’t have to make me a plate, Waves. I can feed myself.”

“Oh no, contrary to popular belief, booze is not the breakfast of champions,” Waverly shoved the plate into Wynonna’s lap and kissed the top of her sister’s head.

“It is for this champion,” Wynonna mumbled as she shoved a forkful of food into her mouth.

\--------

_1 week later._

“Nicole, how badly do you and Wynonna need to go on this recon mission? I highly doubt a week was enough to recover from the damage you took that night.”

“I’m fine Waves,” Nicole cupped the brunette’s face and peppered gentle kisses her forehead, “it’s not really up to me, Wynonna has been hell bent on going after every Revenant, and Bulshar too--I’m just trying to make sure we both come home to you in one piece.”

“You’re doing a good job baby, thank you,” Waverly nuzzled into the redhead’s neck. She was grateful that Wynonna wasn’t going off alone. Sure, Wynonna could have handled herself if she did, but Nicole was more level-headed than Wynonna especially in times when she needed it most. Waverly was rarely allowed to tag along anymore, and she knew it was because both women were scared of losing her too. She only wished they knew how equally afraid she was to lose the two people she loved most in this world as well.

“Haught! Move your ass!” Wynonna shouted from the driveway, her blue truck was rumbling and music was blaring throughout the front yard of the property.

“I’ll see you tonight, we both will—promise,” Nicole gave Waverly a peck on the lips and pressed their foreheads together for a few moments before trotting over to the passenger door of the truck. Waverly watched from the front porch as the truck sped away and took a sharp right turn down the dirt road.

They pulled behind a warehouse, throwing the truck in park before both women stepped out of it. Nicole gazed at the new venue and drew a breath. She was relieved to not be fighting tonight, but she had always been nervous every fight night--whether it was the risk of serious injury or getting caught by authorities...or Waverly.

“Here?” Nicole questioned after she realized they weren’t too far from the Homestead.

“Yeah, not sure how many people caught wind of the new location for tonight,” Wynonna looked around, trying to find anyone she could recognize from previous fight nights, but there wasn’t a soul in sight.

“Are you sure we’re at the right place?”

“Gina wouldn’t lie to us; we’re always on the main cards, HaughtShit.”

Wynonna knocked six beats on the door, a guard on the other side greeted them and both women headed inside. Liquor, smoke, blood, and sweat plagued the already stale air in the warehouse. There was a fight well underway; a large crowd was gathered around two smaller women who were exchanging punches and kicks. Both fighters were extremely athletic, tossing one another into the crowd and flying back to the center of the circle. One of the women ended the fight with a spin kick to the other's jaw. She moved in on her downed opponent like a dog devouring a piece of meat. The referee was quick to rip the victor off of her prey and threw her hand up to signify that the fight was over and won.

"Geez, I'm glad my love for Chinese food and beer put me in a weight class where I don't have to worry about many flying limbs."

"I wish the fighters I went up against ate Chinese food--they're all made of stone," Nicole watched as the losing opponent was dragged out of the circle, blood streaked under her body--her eyes rolled into the back of her head with a mix of drool and blood dribbling out of her mouth. Wynonna turned to the redhead and motioned her to follow as they headed to a room to warm up. They performed their usual routine, starting out with the bag, moving on to striking pads and finally ending with some light sparring. This routine was grounding for both of them, there was so much they didn't have control over in their lives, so much chaos--they never figured something as little as warming up before a fight was crucial in retaining the last bit of sanity they were holding on to.

"You nervous?" Nicole, asked as she was wrapping Wynonna's hands.

"I'm hardly feeling anything these days, I don't miss nerves," Wynonna laughed.

"Look, don't try to come out on top tonight...I need you to come back in one piece, Earp. I don't  
think I can lie to Waverly if you end up like how I did last week."

"Relax Haught, I'll be fine. I haven't gotten a royal ass whooping in a long time. If I do get beat into a bloody pulp, we can hide out in the barn or the basement of Shorty's until I'm fairly coherent."

"You're unbelievable sometimes, you know that Earp?"

"Yeah well, I didn't get this far in life by actually dealing with my problems head on."

There was a knock at the door and a woman poked her head into the room, signaling to the two that it was time to fight. Wynonna bounced around on her feet and shook off the conversation she had with Nicole just now--it was time to focus.

The walk over to the center of the crowd was longer than Wynonna remembered it. Stranger’s eyes watching her, most people bet on Wynonna and she could tell who they were based on how eager they were to see her as she passed by. She could also see who was betting against her--their faces were unmistakably cold, some would spit in her face or yell obscenities at her. Nicole always kept the crowd back when they got too close to Wynonna--sometimes she'd had to shove the fighter along when things got heated with the attendants. They arrived at their respective part of the circle and Wynonna's jaw dropped when she saw her opponent.

"Rosita," the two gasped.

Wynonna fervently lunged towards the dark haired-woman but was pulled back by Nicole.

"You can't fight her, you'll kill her."

"That's the goal, Haught," Wynonna said through gritted teeth.

"Let me fight her."

"Are you fucking kidding me."

"Nope, because your reckless ass is going to get us kicked out of here so fast and then what? You said it yourself we both lack decent coping mechanisms so without this we are fucked.”

"I need this, Nicole--you know what she did to me, she almost took Alice away,” Wynonna wasn’t one to beg, but her eyes were pleading into Nicole’s to let her fight Rosita.

"I know, but you can't do this here. I got you, Earp...let me fight her now and you can take care of her after." Nicole was still holding Wynonna back when she felt the older Earp relax under her grip.

"You better not lose," Wynonna grunted. Nicole nodded and stepped forward into the ring. Rosita had a puzzled look on her face before it hardened once more into a look that could kill. Nicole was unfazed--her only motivation for this fight was to give Wynonna some closure with what happened between the two at Shorty's when Rosita tried to take the newest Earp child as her ticket out of the Ghost River Triangle.

"You look like you’ve been getting on just fine," Nicole muttered to the revenant as she took her fighting stance.

"No thanks to those goddamn Earps," Rosita mirrored Nicole's stance, "you're still with Waverly I take it?" Rosita threw a punch slow enough for Nicole to dodge it. Why was she bothering to go easy on Nicole?

"I'm in it for the long haul." Nicole threw a jab-cross, returning the same tempo Rosita threw at her.

"Come on, Haught--stop dancing and beat her ass!" Wynonna stood restless at the edge of the circle.

"You better watch yourself, they'll do you dirty like they did me."

"They would never do that. I love Waverly and Wynonna treats me like family."

"Family means something completely different to the Earps than what it means to you and me--you know that."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on, Wyatt curses his bloodline for eternity,” Rosita landed a leg check to the redhead's knee. “Ward Earp was an abusive husband and father,” a jab lands on Nicole’s chest. 

“Willa almost ran off with Bobo Del Rey and fucked everyone over. Not to mention Wynonna shot her for fucks sake,” Nicole was able to dodge Rosita’s cross-hook combo and jump back. 

“Let's also not forget the fact that your girlfriend let a witch erase her sister entirely from existence just to save your sorry ass--family doesn't mean shit to them!" Rosita punctuated her words with a kick to Nicole’s stomach, causing her to fall backwards.

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH," Wynonna flew into the ring, barreling towards Rosita. Nicole stepped in front of her and shoved her back towards their corner.

"Back the fuck up Wynonna, I got this--I got you," Nicole might as well have not said anything--Wynonna ignored her, trying to push past the taller woman but to no avail.

"I swear to god you demon bitch, if your legs still work after this you better run like hell because when I get my hands on you I'l--"

"EARP, cool it, I'm serious," Nicole had thrown her back and was in Wynonna's face now. The crowd was cheering at the events unfolding before them, egging the two on in hopes that a bigger fight would ensue.

"Quit fucking around Haught, finish this or I will," Wynonna stepped closer to the redhead, locking eyes before retreating to their fight corner. Nicole turned around to find Rosita waiting in the center of the ring, arms akimbo as she inched closer to her opponent.

"You're part of the curse, Rosita, don't forget that," Nicole push-kicked Rosita, "Wynonna and Waverly are different, they didn't have a choice--"

"Did Waverly not have a choice when she kissed me that one night you two were fighting?"

Nicole dropped her arms out of shock,"What?" 

She was answered with a punch to her sternum, the redhead felt the air leave her lungs--it's not like she could've said anything in response anyway-- _she wouldn't do that...would she?_

"She never told you?" Nicole only sputtered in response as Rosita straddled her--trapping her hips under her thighs to keep the redhead still.

"The second that she realized she could live without you, she cut you out of her life and ran into the arms of another person so fast--"

Nicole didn't give Rosita the chance to finish, she bucked under the dark haired woman and was able to get enough momentum to throw her off. Nicole was on her feet within seconds and spear-headed Rosita into the concrete. Nicole's brain shut off in that moment as her hands wailed on Rosita from every angle--the belligerent crowd was reduced to a dull roar and her vision went blurry.

Nicole suddenly felt her weight shift and before she knew it, she was on her back with Rosita on top of her. The dark haired woman delivered a swift punch to Nicole's nose and then another across her face. She only caught a glimpse of the hostile look in Rosita's eyes before another punch hit her so hard her eyes went cross. Rosita stood up and lifted the officer by her hair, throwing her across the ring. Nicole tried to get up but was grounded by a kick to her ribs. She hit the concrete, hard. Rosita wasted no time kicking her in the stomach to flip her onto her back.

"It's a shame that Wynonna wasted her energy to save you instead of Dolls just to watch you die too," Rosita reached back to deliver a final blow--Nicole struggled hard under the woman, but she felt herself grow weaker as everything began to fade to black.

_She’s right, Wynonna...I'm so sorry--it should have been me-_

A shot rang through Nicole's ears, her eyes shot open long enough to see Rosita fall back and grip her bloodied arm. The officer struggled to her feet, gasping for air while chaos ensued among the crowd.

"Crazy chick with a gun!" Someone screamed as everyone scattered in different directions out of fear of being the next target. Nicole stayed still and kept her eyes on Rosita making sure not to lose her among the madness. Wynonna shot again, this time at Rosita's leg to keep her from running away. The Heir stormed over to the revenant and yanked her up with a vice grip around her neck.

"Up for a little field trip you bag of dicks?" Wynonna didn't give the dark haired woman time to answer as she began dragging her towards the warehouse doors. Nicole would have been foolish to stop Wynonna, she saw the rage burning in the older Earp's eyes--she was almost unrecognizable, a shell of a woman she once was now inhabited by a relentlessly enraged creature driven by revenge.

Nicole followed her and Rosita outside the warehouse. Wynonna stopped at the truck and pulled out a black duffel bag.

"You're dragging ass, Earp. My wounds are gonna heal any minute now and I'm going to--" 

Wynonna didn't say a word as she slammed Rosita's head into the side of her truck. She let go of the woman as she crumpled to the ground and Nicole could only watch in horror.

"That was for Waverly."

It wasn't her place to intervene, she was lucky that Wynonna let her fight Rosita in the first place and now...now she could only hope that Wynonna wasn’t going to do something that she'd regret.

The Heir threw the bag over her shoulder and dragged Rosita's unconscious body around the back of the warehouse. Nicole followed close behind, the guilt that got her into this mess was the same force restraining her, making her into a mere bystander to the horrors she was about to witness.

Nicole was only beginning to realize what Wynonna was about to do when the Heir started to tie up the revenant’s hands and legs.

"Wynonna…" Nicole pleaded, she had never seen it happen before, but she knew a revenant  
experienced a fate much worse than hell when they were thrown outside of the Ghost River Boundary. Wynonna didn't pay her any attention as she lifted Rosita to her feet, the dazed woman finally coming to just in time to find the older Earp's scorching and hate-filled eyes glaring at her own.

"I want to hear you beg for mercy," Wynonna pulled out a rope from her duffel bag and began to tie it around Rosita's waist. Her eyes dark with blood thirst as she kicked her boot right in the middle of Rosita's chest. She grinned wildly--watching the revenant fall over the boundary. Rosita struggled, wailing in agony as every inch of her body burned with the fury of a thousand suns. She felt herself being dragged through the brush and realized the burning had subsided, for now. 

"This is for trying to steal Alice away from me," Wynonna threw Rosita back over the boundary and watched with a sinister grin and a perverse glint in her eyes as the revenant bellowed in pain. Wynonna had only seen this happen once with Bobo when he was being taken to BBD in the back of a truck. She took pity on the demon, sparing him with a blast from Peacemaker between the eyes. This time...this time she was going to let Rosita suffer. For trying to tear apart her family...hell--for just existing. Wynonna was finally feeling something again, she was feeling sweet satisfaction in causing this demon such pain--maybe pain that could finally compare to what Wynonna had been feeling for some time.

Rosita was dragged back over the boundary, clinging to consciousness--extreme burns covered every inch of her body. Wynonna was gearing up to throw Rosita over the boundary again when Nicole grabbed her arm and spun her around.

"Earp that's enough! Doing this isn't going to bring Dolls back."

"You're right, but it’s making feel a hell of a lot better," she tried pushing Rosita back over the boundary but Nicole was quick to yank the revenant farther away from Wynonna.

"Wynonna, please. You're better than this."

"You're wrong, Haught. I feel more alive now than I ever have since Dolls died. I'm tired of being so fucking numb, tired of being the one who loses loved ones, tired of getting hurt. This bitch is it, Nicole. I want someone to feel the same pain I've been feeling, I-I--" Wynonna began to sink to the ground, sobs wracking her body as Nicole wrapped her arms around the Heir, lowering them both onto the ground. The officer held Wynonna tightly, her thumbs smoothing over tense muscles in the woman's back and neck.

"It's okay, I got you Earp...I swear I've got you," Nicole whispered into ash brown hair. She held the other woman for quite some time, Rosita was still out cold and Nicole couldn’t help but wonder if Wynonna was going to finish what she started. Wynonna pulled away from Nicole and stood up, walking over to the revenant’s body and bending down to untie her.

“Wynonna, what are you doing?” Nicole was still on the ground, mouth agape as she watched the older Earp release Rosita from her restraints.

“I’m getting my shit together, Haught,” Wynonna’s tone was void of emotion, but Nicole knew that something had changed within the Heir. She observed as Wynonna crouched down next to Rosita and began to talk to her in a low voice.

“This is your one chance, stay the hell out of purgatory, and stay the fuck away from my family. If I find you again, I promise I will not hesitate to kill you.” 

She stood up from the body and walked over to where Nicole was--still folded on the floor. Nicole was hopeful for Wynonna to finally begin healing after months of ignoring her emotions, packing away her trauma deep within herself with the intention of never letting it resurface. What about Nicole herself? She still felt numb, she still felt her guilt, was she ever going to begin her healing process anytime soon?

"Come on Haught, we gotta go before Waverly wakes up," she heard a familiar voice behind her as an arm wrapped around her middle and hoisted her up to her feet. Wynonna pulled the officer to the truck and started off towards home once they were settled in.

"Nicole," Wynonna said barely above a whisper, "I'm sorry...I should've let you handle Rosita--you got a better head on your shoulders than I do, I just got worried that I was going to lose you back there." 

Nicole broke under the weight of Wynonna’s words and a whimper slip out as she struggled to keep her hand steady over her mouth. This was the second time Wynonna had saved her from certain death. Nicole still couldn’t fathom why this woman resolved that her life was important enough to save once, let alone a second time. Nicole thought she deserved to feel pain, to be deprived of happiness since Dolls couldn’t experience it anymore. She didn’t think she deserved to be saved, especially not by Wynonna.

"Why did you save me?" Nicole finally broke the silence, wiping away the tears that streaked her face.

"What?" Wynonna gave her a puzzled look.

"Back at the cliff when you were holding on to the rope, why did you save me? We both could have gone over, you held on anyway."

"I'm a stubborn ass, you know that," Wynonna kept her eyes straight ahead, "I should've been the one to go over the cliff for Peacemaker--but you went all REI Co-Op and strapped yourself in before I could put up much of a fight. I told you I wasn't going to let go."

"You should have Wynonna!" Nicole yelled, her voice quavering, "Dolls was more important to the team than I am--you should've let go, you should've been smart, Earp."

"What the actual fuck, Nicole!" Wynonna screamed back, "you've always been a crucial part of this team--and I'm sorry I didn't realize that so soon, but I wasn't going to let go of you--I wasn't going to lose somebody that's important to me, to my sister, to Purgatory--FUCK Haught," Wynonna ran a frantic hand through her hair and took a deep breath, "take it back."

"What?"

"TAKE IT BACK NICOLE."

"Why would I--"

Wynonna slammed on the brakes and pulled over to the side of the empty road. Nicole took the chance to get out and began to storm away from the truck.

"HEY, ASSHOLE!" Nicole was quickly tackled to the ground by Wynonna. The two rolled around on the asphalt, swapping blows until Wynonna was straddling Nicole with both hands on her biceps so she couldn't move.

"Listen to me you shit ticket!" Wynonna almost pleading to the restless woman under her.

"This is what you've been wanting to do to me since Dolls died huh? You want to beat the ever living shit out of me--go ahead! I deserve this, Wy--" Nicole was caught off guard by a slap to the face. She used whatever strength she had left to try and ineffectively throw the Heir off of her.

"Like hell you do, you girl scout on steroids. For once can you just listen before getting all huffy and righteous?"

Nicole glared up at the older Earp, she was struggling to catch her breath and Wynonna took that as a sign to keep talking.

"Look, Dolls was going to die anyway. That bastard only told Jeremy about the shit he was going through. I didn't make peace with that at first, but I never wished that it was you who would have died that day," Wynonna let go of the redhead's arms and instead gripped Nicole's shirt and pulled her closer to her face, her eyes burning with sympathy and hurt. 

"I'm not losing you," she shook Nicole as if to help the redhead process her every word, "not now...not ever. So take it back Nicole because if you don't, I will physically make you swallow your words."

Nicole was searching for any sign in Wynonna's eyes that she was lying--that she was only saying this so that Nicole would just shut up and they could get off of this dark, lonely road and just go home. Much to her surprise, she found Wynonna to be telling the truth, her face softened and her eyes delivering a strong sense of sincerity down Nicole’s spine.

"Alright, I take it back. I'm sorry Wyn. I just--I know he was important to you--"

Nicole tensed as the older Earp pulled her into a tight embrace. She relaxed once she realized that Wynonna was sniffling into the taller woman's shoulder. Nicole hugged the Heir back, paying no mind to her shirt being dampened with hot tears for the second time that night.  
"You're important to me too," Wynonna said tearfully, "don't ever forget that Nicole. Because if you do, I'll kick your ass."

Nicole was caught off guard by a warm sensation in her chest--her throat was closing as she tried fighting back the tears welling in her eyes. She gave in and shared a cry with Wynonna, both folded into one another in the middle of the road, sobbing uncontrollably. Nicole had been convinced for the longest time that she deserved to die instead of Dolls. This fight club was her opportunity to atone for her existence. Sometimes, she let her guard down and would eat the punches and kicks that proceeded. Pain and anger were the only things she could feel until tonight--tonight, she finally felt wanted, she finally felt alive again.

Wynonna was the first to let go, she offered a hand and pulled the redhead to her feet and the two walked back to the truck and started home once more.

The sun had already begun to rise when the women walked through the front doors of the homestead. Waverly had fallen asleep on the couch in a failed attempt to wait up for them. Nicole smiled at the sight of her sleeping girlfriend, she walked over to grab an additional blanket before returning to the brunette and picking her up to go upstairs.

"Haught," Wynonna called.

"Yeah Wyn?" Nicole turned her head to find the Heir at the bottom of the stairs.

"Thanks for being a good friend, I promise everything's gonna be okay," Wynonna felt a strong wave of emotion--because for once she actually believed that everything would be okay.

"I know, right back at you, Earp."


End file.
